Civic Imagination

The forgiveness in a mexican family

A girl was born in Oaxaca, Mexico. One of the poorest states in Mexico. Her family had coffee plantations they were wealthy enough to gave her a good education. When she was a little girl, she always went with the boys and play sports. She was very open with everybody. She turned 17, and met a business man from Mexico City. They got married 2 years later. They had two daughters and two sons. 1 year later the husband cheated on her and had a son out of the marriage with a really bad woman. The bastard was born, and with him it came another one. The Lady find out, so she got divorced from that man and she took their four children. The man declared bankrupt, his company and money was gone for all the bad decision and the wrong path he took. The lady started worrying about everything so she got depresses for 3 years. He travel around the world for many years, coming and going. Her children were like abandoned and were taken care by two nannies. After the woman recover she came back to take care of her sons and daughters. She only said one thing, "you have to be successful in this life." The years passed and the oldest daughter got married with a successful mexican businessman. 18 years after the divorce, ex-couple encounter each other in their daughters wedding, and the little girl from Oaxaca, now an older woman, remarried her ex-husband. All the hatred and regrets were gone; the actions of the man have been forgiven, and now they live like a normal Family from Mexico City. 

This family is mine. Over the years we have struggle a lot with the situation. It is not common in the mexican high society to divorce or to screwed your marriage. Also, my family was seen like a dissfuncional family and sometime people repelled us from the groups we belonged. All this time, I've been engaged with sons from divorced families and also join the church. When my mother got the depression, nothing was clear to me. I was very young and I didn't understand what was going on. When I started to be a teenager, I focus a lot on protecting my family because I felt they were very vulnerable. and my mom suffered a lot but she hide her feelings from us, telling us everything was going to be ok for everybody and always pressuring us to be the most successful. This was the best example my mom could ever gave to me, the power of forgiveness and letting things go. I have shared this story with my friends and some people I meet in this random life. All the situation has change my perspective about marriage and family. For me, family is the most important thing in life. I think if anyone wants to make a change in the world you have to start with yourself and then your family. Family is the base of society, and is the one thing that you will always have in your mind or/and heart. All this changes that have been going on in my family just makes me think how normal status is. I know success is a huge thing in my family, but there is nothing wrong of being normal. We were educated not to be like the rest of the people, we always have to stand out. But sometimes you have to let go and enjoy the simplest things life gives you. 

It can inspire people that has problem to forgive other people and themselves from the mistakes they have done in the past. Everything will arrange again. Sad times are always in a person, but you have to embrace it and be able to enjoy life. I shared this story because of the meaning that has for me. This story has changes my life and I am part of it. All the struggles need to succeed and if not learn from the failure, and learning from failure is one of the most important things to impact yourself and others.  

This is a song that I listen when I think about this story. Also when i'm homesick.

Forgiveness; Family; Society; Life; Regret; Change; Success; Happy


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