Understory 2021

Winter Wonderland

Leaves coat the street, reminding me that the dark is coming
That dark, it feels so foreign upon its approach
It makes quick time and soon engulfs my being
The sensation is so familiar, yet I am still whisked off my feet
Frolicking in the coldness of it all, the excess light begins to slip from my fingertips
Slowly it creeps into my eyes until there is nothing but white
Neither alive nor dead, I lose feeling, and everything hurts
More painful than anything I’ve endured
But a slow pain, like molasses in January it; it has become tolerable now
As I regain focus I realize that it has always been there
The absence of pain is not that but the ability to be numb
Numb like -10 in a snowstorm
Numb like crying for no reason, and every reason
Numb like a pinch trying to divert attention
Numb.
I feel numb.
I am numb.
I love numb.
After all - it’s preferable to pain. 

                                                                  
WILLEM STURM is a freshman pursuing a General Education degree.

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