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• 1 media/screenshot4spalsh.png 2021-02-14T16:57:34-08:00 Manifest NO 28 How do we become fluent in hearing and saying No? image_header 2021-04-16T14:04:32-07:00

  Sarah Ahmed reminds us that "You might be free to say no but your no is heard as destructive; hearings have consequences (becoming a killjoy is a consequence) . . . .  And then no becomes judged not only as how you stop others from doing something, but how you stop yourself from being something . . . They might not stop you from saying no but they make it costly for you to say no. " (Ahmed, 2017)

  She cautions that "You need more than a right to say no for no to be effective."  She warns that "If your position is precarious you might not be able to afford no. You might say yes if you cannot afford to say no, which means you can say yes whilst disagreeing with something. "  She implores us that "This is why the less precarious might have a political obligation to say no on behalf of or alongside those who are more precarious."   (Ahmed, 2017)
  
  That's why we  created a genealogy of workplace refusal, because by talking about such a thing, by  learning together how to read the story of refusal, we can have a common narrative, a common acceptance of the language of "No" that allows us to examine the dead-ends and false turns workplace responses to crisis narratives can take. We can instead write and think and negotiate other ways forward that are informed by our fictional, feminist,racist, labor and abundant past.

  
  
  Learning to say "No" starts with us.
  
  This flowchart, created by Shira Peltzman, can be a useful tool for individuals who might have another project added to their pile-- but it requires being honest with yourself, your capacity, and your joy of a project. But, in reality: is an hour spent at work better than an hour spent doing something you love? How can we say NO to projects or tasks, so that we can say yes to things we love? And, even if a project meets all of those requirements, does a not NO automatically mean a YES? (Peltzman ends the flowchart not with, accept the project, but consider it. In other words, this is the absolute  minimum requirements a project needs to meet, but does not mean one should automatically commit to the project)
  
  
  In learning to say NO, we also need to challenge those that supervise us. If a boss is pressuring us to commit to a new project, to complete a project early and/or with fewer resources, we need to find impactful ways to refuse. While outright saying "No" might be both impossible, we can reframe the conversation. We can utilize powerful phrases like

  • I can take on powerful phrases, but I will need your help prioritizing my responsibilities and removing any tasks."
  • I can complete this project early given these resources.
  • I can help with this if I am given the support of collaborators X, Y, and/or Z.

  
  And, if all of these feel like too big of a first step, fret not: try saying "No" in a more light-hearted way. We recommend the game "Say No! More," which teaches you how to say a variety of different ways to say "No."