Beneath the Surface
by Dylan Rasmussen
The tics of Tourette syndrome are driven by cravings of action, whether it be an expressive movement or vocalization. Often these cravings are insuppressible. This leads to an especially complex relationship, as Sacks aptly describes, of “[disorder] and self, ‘it’ and ‘I,’ especially when Tourette’s emerges in early childhood (78). “It” and “I” mesh in every situation, until, as in Dr. Bennett’s case, they become seen as a cohesive individual.There is a great deal of insight to be gained from his periodic self-reflections. “[Dr.] Bennet sometimes calls Tourette’s ‘a disease of disinhibition.’ He says there are thoughts, not unusual in themselves that anyone might have in passing but are normally inhibited. With him, such thoughts perseverate in the back of the mind, obsessively, and burst out suddenly, without his consent or intention” (Sacks 84). Such describes one side of the relationship between the “it” and the “I.” Hearing something on the news, or reading an odd word or phrase, may cause a compulsion to tic to linger within his mind. In an unrelated situation this compulsion may emerge, whether it be in the form of movement or recalling the phrase.
In spite of his seemingly placid behavior, Dr. Bennett reveals that there also exists a more frightening, primal aspect of Tourette’s. He explains to Sacks that
“the real problems, the inner problems, are panic and rage – feelings so violent that they threaten to overwhelm him, and so sudden that he has virtually no warning of their onset. He has only to get a parking ticket or see a police car, sometimes, for scenarios of violence to flash through his mind: mad chases, shoot-outs, flaming destructions, violent mutilations, and death scenarios that become immensely elaborate within seconds and rush through his mind with convulsive speeds” (100).
Far too often this darker side of Tourette syndrome is overlooked. Dr. Bennet's continuous struggle to inhibit reactions to these scenes adds another layer of complexity to understanding Tourette’s and it’s influence on the mind and the brain.
