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As I Remember It: Teachings (Ɂəms tɑɁɑw) from the Life of a Sliammon Elder The Sliammon-language term for this label means “it is mine.” This book contains the teachings and history of the ɬaʔamɩn people as remembered and narrated by Elder Elsie Paul. The effort and care she takes in this work is important. She offers a counter-narrative to incorrect and inappropriate interpretations previously drawn by settlers. Please respect Elsie Paul’s right and responsibility to relate the history and teachings in her own words. She does so from her own perspective and does not attempt to speak for all ɬaʔamɩn people. Please attribute the stories shared in this book to Elsie Paul.

Some sections of this book are authored by other individuals and should be attributed to the appropriate person(s) as indicated. This label refers to a teaching that emerges throughout this book: “you learn from someone by example.” (The literal translation of tiʔiwš is “fast learner.”) The goal of this book is to share ɬaʔamɩn teachings and history widely with ɬaʔamɩn community members, students, and teachers at all levels, and with any other interested readers. This is Elsie’s goal in sharing ʔəms tɑʔɑw, and all of the authors hope the book serves an educational purpose. The authors ask readers to take care to use this information respectfully and in context. Material in this book may be culturally sensitive for a number of reasons. This label identifies such content by stating: “it is ours.”

ɬaʔamɩn teachings, laws, and practices that flow from them are subject to the ʔəms naʔ label because they are communally held and collectively stewarded by ɬaʔamɩn people for future generations. Much of this knowledge is captured in our legends, for example. The authors recognize that ɬaʔamɩn, Klahoose, and Homalco families have their own tellings of the legends.

Other parts of the book are labelled “ʔəms naʔ” because the ongoing nature of settler colonialism means that the histories discussed here are not part of a distant past. For close to a century, colonial laws and policies prevented community members from sharing teachings freely in their community without fear of punishment or retribution, imposing silences that remain even today. Thus this label also applies to chapters that discuss the genocidal practices that sought to interrupt the transmission of teachings and to sever ɬaʔamɩn sovereign rights to their territory.

Please treat information and photographs marked with this label with special care, especially if you plan to share them with others.

Orford River (2)

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sohoθot (Spirit Cleansing)
“The ritual is called ‘sohoθot.’ ‘sohoθot’ – it’s what it’s called in itself. You get up, your – whomever, your parents would say, ‘hoč sohoθot.’ ‘Go and do your cleansing!’ That’s it in a nutshell. That’s what you’re supposed to do.”
The belief is that we are one with the animal kingdom. That we are one in spirit! And that’s very, very strong – very, very important. They are living things, as we are. And so we are one with all the living beings, living things. So that’s how people were so connected to the land, to the animal kingdom. People were very pure – very, very close to nature. Whenever a person, whether it be a young woman – especially the young men, when they reached puberty, they were sent on a quest, a vision quest, to go and bathe in the river, to go and bathe every morning in the river, get up before everyone else is up. That is so important. You go and bathe in the river, whether it was winter – summer and winter. Yeah. So that was really important. It’s like a purification.
And while you’re there, doing your cleansing with cedar boughs and dippin’ it into the water and just brushin’ yourself, because again, there’s so much good energy from the cedar boughs – that’s a living thing – a living thing, it’s cleansing. So when you’re in the river, you’re using that and brushin’ yourself, like, “Help me today. Help me to be able to do the things I need to do. Help me to be productive today. Guide me today.” Those are the words that are what is said in this morning ritual. And when you’re finished brushin’, then you either leave your bundles by the river, tie them up and leave them there – you hang them on the tree – or you can toss them in the river. So that way it drifts away. It’s washed away. So that’s all your laziness being washed down the river, all your ailments or whatever may be with you that you’re carrying, all goes away from you. You are refreshed. And then you go on with your day.
The ritual is called “sohoθot.” “sohoθot” – it’s what it’s called in itself. You get up, your – whomever, your parents would say, “hoč sohoθot.” “Go and do your cleansing!” That’s it in a nutshell. That’s what you’re supposed to do. Because that’s what the men in the family do. They go in the river and do that every morning. And it was an embarrassment if you didn’t do that. If you are lazy, that was an embarrassment. If you were sleeping in, that was not a good image of you to your community. You’re embarrassin’ your family. So you need to uphold yourself. You need to uphold your family name. Otherwise people will talk, and ridicule your family because there’s a lazy young man in the family. So those are the things that’s really important in one’s life. Especially the beginning of life. Going into manhood from a young boy, teen. It’s puberty. And you gotta do all of these things now, to prove yourself – that you’re trained to be strong, to do things that’s tough, but it has to be done. You don’t give in to being lazy: “Get up and go and do it.”
“You don’t get anywhere – you don’t start your day without doing that.”
There’s just so much around that: the use of the cedar, the use of the river, the water. The water is very powerful, its energy, and that’s always been recognized with our people. It’s cleansing. It gives you life. If it wasn’t there, then we would not survive. So therefore, it’s used for that purpose, for helping you with your energy level. When I’ve gone away to take part in ceremonies, because some of the people that are there do actually go to a creek, or they go to the beach, like in December and January, and they go and bathe. And it’s freezing outside. And I thought, “What? You went down the beach and had a dip in the ocean!” “Oh yeah. I’ve been doing it all my life and it feels really good. You don’t feel it anymore. You don’t hesitate. You just do it.” So, there are still people that do it. And it works. It’s something that’s – it’s medicine. It’s a pick-me-up-er. You don’t get anywhere – you don’t start your day without doing that.
“When you lose someone in your family, and you’re grieving, you really need to focus on that cleansing. Otherwise you’re going to carry your grief.”
That kind of cleansing works for all kinds of things. The old people used to talk about, when you lose someone in your family, and you’re grieving, you really need to focus on that cleansing. Otherwise you’re going to carry your grief. Your grief is very heavy, and it’ll make you sick. Or if you know that people have some resentments to you, or they’re trying to hurt you in some way, with words, that’s when you do that brushin’ as well. Because people’s words can be really hurtful. They can be really damaging to you. And if you don’t take care of yourself, then you’re gonna be feeling heavy. These words will penetrate through your skin with what was said, and it’ll hurt you emotionally and mentally. So in your mind, when you’re brushing yourself, you’re getting rid of all these words that are stuck to you – they’re penetrating you, these statements about you. “I don’t have to take this. I don’t need this. It’s not mine. It doesn’t belong to me,” and you brush it away. The old people used to say that words from other people, sharp words or nasty words said to you, are like sharp objects, they’re like needles, they’re like little knives, they’re penetrating your skin. You’re bleeding, you’re walking, you’re bleeding. You don’t see it, but you are. As you’re walking wounded. So therefore, that’s why you do the brushing. You don’t own it – you push it away: “It’s not mine to keep.”
So, that’s the importance of the brushin’, and with women, it wasn’t necessary for women to go to the river, but they did their own cleansing at home. In, like, a basin of water. Or if they have access to a little creek or something, that’s where they would go and use that cedar boughs to brush themselves too, and especially if they’re grieving, going through a hard time with different losses. I can only relate to my grandmother, in her time, of how many children she’d lost in her life. She had sixteen children in total, and she lost ten children, at various ages, and the eldest being ten years of age. She lost two children in one day. They were living up in Theodosia, and two of her babies were really sick. So they got on the boat to take the children to see the – there used to be a – called her an Indian doctor. She was a psychic. She was a healer. She lived on Cortes Island, on Klahoose reserve there. So she wanted to take the babies there, to this lady. So and – course they didn’t have motor – they rowed or whatever, however means they went there. And before they got there, one of the children died. And so they got there and the other one died. It was too late to save. I don’t know what kind of illness the baby had. But she lost a lot of her babies. Yeah, it was difficult times for people. There were a lot of baby deaths. Just through sickness and whooping cough and whatever other ailments, pneumonia, I guess.

But even with all that, people took that in their stride, and that’s how life was. Just dealing with it, and … lettin’ it go. And through her many losses, she grieved, and in constant grief, but this was how she took care of her grief, was by going and brushing with the cedar first thing in the morning – early, early in the morning. Breaking daylight, was when she would be up. And I would hear her cryin’ and wailin’ out there as she would take a basin of water and go out the back of the house and do her cleansing. And with us livin’ up the coast, I always – I would hear her. She would cry out there and wail. And I think that was good therapy. For her it was really good therapy. And she’d just come in and tell us, “Okay, you all get up now.”
“And she would talk to us: ‘You must have heard me cryin’ out there. But I do that. That’s my medicine. I have to release my pain in the morning. Otherwise, it’s too heavy.’”
And she would talk to us: “You must have heard me cryin’ out there. But I do that. That’s my medicine. I have to release my pain in the morning. Otherwise, it’s too heavy. It’s a burden for me to carry that. Then I brush myself. I sweep myself with a cedar bough. I even take some of that water and I gargle, and then spew it out.” And that’s not only cleansing the surface of your body, your outer surface of your body, but you’re cleansing your mouth – you’re spewin’ it out. You say, “Leave me. Go away.” And you spew it in different directions, some of that water. So that’s releasing? That was good medicine for her.
And she’d come in and, “I’ve done what I needed to do,” and get everybody up and get busy. And she would say, “It’s okay to grieve. It hurts, because I’ve lost someone I love. But we don’t stay in bed and cry all day. Life goes on. You have to get up and get things moving, get things done. We got a lot of work to do.” So for her, it was fine. And we understood that. We all knew that! And it’s quite different today that we’ve lost that practice. That quite often people will go to pharmacy and get sedatives and tranquilizers to deal with the pain they’re carryin’, which only covers the pain. You’re going to have to deal with it sooner or later. And when you do it the way I remember seeing it done, then you’re dealing with it right from the moment of your loss. You gonna keep on doing it.