Fearless and honest

Gwen also resolved the conflict about staying with the Army.  She decided to retire, although the military tried to persuade her to stay regardless of her retirement age and the exhaustion. She is happy with the recognitions and awards she received, but with the help of her therapist, she was able to dare to let go and find her ability to trust her own decisions outside the military hierarchy. 

“My husband and I are still adjusting to coming back. He was so relieved when I did the retirement. He said, that now they can’t take you away and snap you out of my life for a year,” she says.

Gwen also recognizes that life is full of trauma. Not everyone goes through a war, but if you do, it alters you forever. “You don’t have to be altered in a bad way. You can decode. Some people make critical life decisions to help others or take a new road, because they have gone through a trauma. I feel bad that I lost a patient. That will always haunt me. But I believe I am on the path to becoming a better person because of what I went through.”

Gwen is determined to use her experience to help others. “Some people are going to be scarred for life. Not everybody is going to turn around. I am sad to see some of the cynicism and hatred that we are putting on this new generation. I am hopeful people will find what I found. You can live through trauma and decide to become a better person.”