For the first assignment of the class, I was expected to choose a character in a novel and come up with six kinds of sounds relevant to the character’s identity. As I had to come up with six different sounds, I thought of a character that was complex but, at the same time, easily understandable for readers. I chose Kathy H. in Kazuo Ishiguro’s <Never Let Me Go>. As a main character and narrator, she openly discusses problems in her dystopian society in which clones like Kathy are blocked from knowing harsh reality and deserving freedom, being forced to donate organs until “completion,” or death. As a clone who questions coldness of society, she overthrows her expectation that clones are emotionless and reveals the complexity of humane clones which is often ignored. In order to explore her human qualities, I examined her imagination, forgiveness, independence, consideration and passivity, the five qualities that are developed from her childhood to her adulthood. I included songs and sound effects such as the Carpenters’ “Reason to Believe” Richard Marx’s “Right Here Waiting For You” and continuous waterfall sounds which seemed to depict her complex and human-like characteristics.

Never Let Me Go movie poster

Kathy's friends in movie: Ruth (left), Tommy (middle) and Kathy (right)

One of the challenges, especially because this was the first project of the class, was to come up with deep analysis of the sonic elements of each audio piece. At this time, I didn’t have much experience describing a relationship between characteristics and sonic elements, so it wasn’t easy for me to summarize the effect of sounds into few words. Furthermore, since English isn’t my first language, I had a few issues in phrasing sentences correctly. Thus, for my revision, I considered including more analysis of sounds in depth and tightening up language. Working on the soundlist essay taught me to really dig myself into understanding the conflict between humaneness and the coldness and harsh reality of a clone’s life. What is it to be a human? To be a clone? Kathy’s reflections on her clone life surely shed light on these questions.

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Soundlist: Kathy in <Never Let Me Go>- DRAFT 

Kazuo Ishiguro's Never Let Me Go is a dystopian novel based in British clone society in the late 1990's. Kathy, the protagonist and narrator, recalls her experiences from her childhood and adulthood, talking about her memories in Hailsham and the Cottage (places for young clones to make them stay healthy and happy, and, as they become young adults, to help them prepare as donors—those who donate their organs—or carers—clones who take care of donors who have successfully donated their organs) and Donor Recovery Center (where she spends a lot of time as an adult carer). As she expands on her explanation, it becomes clear that clones are restricted from freedom and are forced to accept their unfortunate fate, removing their vital organs and recuperating between donations until their “completion,” or death. In this soundlist, I will examine influence of systemized and dystopian society on Kathy’s characteristic change: from a naïve, considerate and self-assured girl to yearning yet passive woman.

 
Judy Bridgewater- Never Let Me Go


And never, never, never, let me go.…..

As an eleven-year-old girl, Kathy interprets “baby, baby, never let me go” as the voice of a woman talking to her child, who was infertile but then miraculously gives birth to one. She holds the pillow as if it was her baby and happily dances while listening to this song played from her favorite cassette tape. It is obvious in a general perspective, however, that Kathy’s interpretation is wrong: “baby, baby” is actually directed to the singer’s lover, not her literal baby. Her literal interpretation of her surroundings implies her innocence. Similar to how Kathy misunderstood the original meaning of the song, she also misconceives her future: she won’t have babies but only donate her organs until her completion. I think Never Let Me Go’s mellow and romantically (lovingly) sounding melody makes Kathy’s romantic (unrealistic) thoughts about her future ironic, and shattered.

Sound of Tape Rewind                  


I also think this sound effect of tape rewinding acknowledges Kathy’s attempt to fantasize her “baby,” again and again.

 

Carpenters- Reason to Believe


If I gave you time to change my mind
I'd find a way just to leave the past behind

While Kathy hangs out in Hailsham with her friends, she sees boys getting ready to play football and a boy named Tommy, a male protagonist as known as Kathy's ‘soon-to-be-best-friend,’ being left out of the game and laughed by several other boys. He reacts to this rejection by throwing tantrums, and then girls, even including Kathy’s friends, start to laugh at him. Unlike her friends, Kathy does her best to understand his horrible feelings and comfort him, but all he does to her is hitting across her face with his arm. When she thinks about Tommy’s rude and immature slapping, Kathy believes that his action was simply accidental and there should have been a reason that let Tommy to slap her. Although his rude response tests her patience and causes her to leave him, it is still important to almost dismiss Kathy’s ultimate decision and rather give a credit to her attempt to pity on someone: everyone around her just laughed behind him, but she took a step ahead. Carpenters’ “Reason to Believe” features Karen Carpenter’s earnest voice and gentle melody, which, I believe, describes Kathy’s sincere willingness to understand someone in depth. This incident may seem bad-mannered on surface, but it leads Kathy and Tommy to be closest friends because Tommy does decide to “change his mind,” and Kathy “[leaves] the past behind.”

 

Life is a Highway- Tom Cochrane


There's a world outside every darkened door
Where blues won't haunt you anymore

 "I do like the feeling of getting into my little car, knowing for the next couple of hours I'll have only the roads, the big grey sky and my daydreams for company.”


Kathy spends a lot of her time enjoying “the feeling of getting into [her] car” because she likes to enjoy her solitude. Although donor clones are virtually restricted from traveling, She utilizes her privilege to travel with her best friends and to reminisce: as she drives and feels the outside world, she repurchases her Judy Bridgewater cassette tape with Tommy (she loses it soon after she listens to the song with her ‘baby pillow’) in the store and visits Hailsham to remind herself experiences and friendships she made. When she gets into a car, she has “only the roads, the big grey sky and [her] daydreams for company,” which means that she doesn’t have to feel pressured because of her responsibilities and societal pressure specifically injected to clones. ‘Life is a Highway’ has enthusiastically sounding melody and voice which doesn’t sound too heavy, so it suitably describes Kathy’s feelings without burdens. Also, the music video features Cochrane driving in countryside, which parallels to Kathy driving in British countryside.

 

Richard Marx- Right Here Waiting


Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will be right here waiting for you.

"I stayed beside her like that for as long as they let me, three hours, maybe longer."

After Ruth, Kathy’s best friend and client/ donor, completes her last (second for her) donation, Kathy realizes that Ruth is feeling very weak and she won't make it through. Kathy “[stays] beside [Ruth]” because she values her friendship and tells her that she accepts Ruth’s wish (she asks Kathy to be Tommy’s carer). Even after Ruth passes away, Kathy and Tommy often talk about their times spent with her. Her last moments with Ruth seem to contradict the notions of clone society because her feelings are so humane: she truly cares about her job and her bond with friends and rejects the prevalent creed that clones are expected to be emotionless and robot-like. Right Here Waiting seems to reflect on her love that comes from the bottom of her heart because the melody and the lyrics overall is directed to someone whom the singer loves dearly. So here is the question Kathy leaves to the readers: what is it to be a human or a clone? Do clones have to be emotionless?

 

Sound of Waterfall         


 “I keep thinking about this river somewhere, with the water moving really fast. And these two people in the water, trying to hold onto each other, holding on as hard as they can, but in the end it's just too much. The current's too strong. They've got to let go, drift apart.”

Now it is obvious that Kathy doesn’t stand for the expectations for clones in her society, but here is a question: so does she voice out to defend her beliefs for humane emotions and love? Unfortunately, the answer is ‘no.’  After Ruth’s completion, Tommy talks about his water image to Kathy:  two people in the water try not to lose each other, but “in the end it’s just too much” because “current’s too strong.” The two people, in this context, are Kathy and Tommy. They try their best to request deferral, a system that is rumored to allow two clones who are deeply in love defer their donations for few years. Nonetheless, it turns out deferral doesn’t exist at all: they cannot escape from their dystopian society and have to be separated by their sad fate.

After Tommy’s completion, Kathy drives to Hailsham and realizes that she will receive a notice to become a donor. She also thinks she has been lost in her daydream, or romantic expectation for her life she just can’t deserve as a clone. Of course, she feels sad and tears little bit, but she thinks she cannot avoid her predetermined destiny but to allow it to “let go.” Sound of Waterfall encourages the readers to think about the imagery of strong water currents both aurally and visually. The two-hour video of continuous, strong waterfall is a good aid to imagine the toughness of “water metaphor” on Kathy to prevent “[drifting] apart.”

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Soundlist:: Kathy H. in <Never Let Me Go>- REVISED

List of Sounds:

1. Judy Bridgewater- Never Let Me Go

2. Sound of Tape Rewind

3. The Carpenters- Reason To Believe

4. Tom Cochrane- Life is a Highway

5. Richard Marx- Right Here Waiting For You

6. The Sound of Waterfall

Kazuo Ishiguro's Never Let Me Go is a dystopian novel that depicts British clone society in the late 1990s. Kathy, the protagonist and narrator, recalls her experiences from her childhood and adulthood, talking about her memories in Hailsham and the Cottage (places for young clones to stay healthy and happy, and, as they become young adults, to help them prepare to be either donors—those who donate  their organs—or carers—clones who take care of donors who have successfully donated their organs). In the second half of the book, she spends time at the Donor Recovery Center, where she spends a lot of time as an adult carer. Through her narration, it becomes clear that clones are restricted from freedom and are forced to accept their unfortunate fate, removing their vital organs and recuperating between donations  until their “completion,” or death. In this soundlist, I will examine the influence of systematized and dystopian society on Kathy’s characteristic change: from a naïve, considerate and self-assured girl to a yearning, yet passive woman.

Kathy H.

1. Judy Bridgewater- Never Let Me Go

And never, never, never, let me go.…..

As an eleven-year-old girl, Kathy interprets “baby, baby, never let me go” as the voice of a woman talking to her child, who was infertile but then miraculously gives birth. She holds the pillow as if it was her baby and happily dances while listening to this song played from her favorite cassette tape. It is obvious upon listening to the song, however, that Kathy’s interpretation is wrong: “baby, baby” is actually directed to the singer’s lover, not her literal baby. Her literal interpretation of her surroundings implies her innocence. Similar to how Kathy misunderstood the original meaning of the song, she also misconceives her future: she won’t have babies but only donate her organs until her completion. I think the mellow and romantically (lovingly) sounding melody in “Never Let Me Go” makes Kathy’s romantic (unrealistic) thoughts about her future ironic. 

2. Sound of Tape Rewind                  

In the story, Kathy continuously plays her favorite song by rewinding the cassette. This sound effect of tape rewinding acknowledges Kathy’s  attempt to fantasize her “baby,” again and again. Playing the tape allows her to enjoy the freedom to explore her imagination.

3. Carpenters- Reason to Believe

If I gave you time to change my mind
I'd find a way just to leave the past behind

While Kathy hangs out in Hailsham with her friends, she sees boys  getting ready to play football. She also sees a boy named Tommy, a male protagonist who is Kathy's ‘soon-to-be-best-friend,’ being left out of  the game and laughed by the boys. He reacts to this rejection by throwing tantrums, and then girls, including Kathy’s friends, start to  laugh at him. Unlike her friends, Kathy does her best to understand his  feelings and comfort him. However, he responds by hitting across her face with his arm. When she thinks about Tommy’s rude and immature slapping, Kathy believes that his action was simply accidental and there should have been a reason that caused Tommy to slap her. Although his rude response tests her patience and causes her to leave him, it is still important to give credit to her attempt to pity him: everyone around her just laughed behind his back, but she had sympathy. The Carpenters’ “Reason to Believe” features Karen Carpenter’s earnest voice and gentle melody, which describes Kathy’s sincere willingness to understand someone in depth. It also features a lot of harmony between a woman and a man, describing the solid relationship between Kathy and Tommy. The addition of strings in the chorus conveys the sense of peacefulness that reflects the growing sense of comfort in their friendship. This incident may portray Tommy in a bad light initially, but it leads Kathy and Tommy to be closest friends because Tommy does decide to “change his mind,” and Kathy “[leaves] the past behind.”

4. Life is a Highway- Tom Cochrane

There's a world outside every darkened door
Where blues won't haunt you anymore

 "I do like the feeling of getting into my little car, knowing for the next couple of hours I'll have only the roads, the big grey sky and my daydreams for company.”

Kathy spends a lot of her time enjoying “the feeling of getting into [her] car” because she likes to enjoy her solitude. Although donor clones are virtually restricted from traveling, she utilizes her privilege as a carer to travel with her best friends and to reminisce: as she drives and feels the outside world, she repurchases her Judy Bridgewater cassette tape with Tommy (she had lost it soon after she listened to the song with her ‘baby pillow’) in the store. Later on, she visits Hailsham to remind herself of experiences and friendships that she made. When she gets into a car, she has “only the roads, the big grey sky and [her] daydreams for company,” which means that she doesn’t have to feel pressured because of her responsibilities and the later threat of becoming a donor. “Life is a Highway” has enthusiastic melody and voice which doesn’t sound too heavy, so it suitably describes Kathy’s feelings without burdens. Also, the music video features Cochrane driving in the countryside, which parallels to Kathy driving in the British countryside.

5. Richard Marx- Right Here Waiting

Wherever you go, whatever you do, I will be right here waiting for you.

"I stayed beside her like that for as long as they let me, three hours, maybe longer."

After Ruth, Kathy’s best friend and client/donor, completes her last (second for her) donation, Kathy realizes that Ruth is feeling very weak and she won't survive. Kathy “[stays] beside [Ruth]” because she values her friendship and tells her that she accepts Ruth’s wish (she asks Kathy to be Tommy’s carer). Even after Ruth passes away or “completes,” Kathy and Tommy often talk about the times they spent with her. Her last moments with Ruth seem to contradict the notions of clone society because her feelings are so humane: she truly cares about her job and her bond with friends and rejects the prevalent creed that clones are expected to be emotionless and robot-like. “Right Here Waiting” seems to reflect on her love that comes from the bottom of her heart because the melody and the lyrics overall are directed to someone whom the singer loves dearly. So here is the question that Kathy leaves to the readers: what is it to be a human or a clone? Do clones have to be emotionless? 

6. Sound of Waterfall          

 “I keep thinking about this river somewhere, with the water moving really fast. And these two people in the water, trying to hold onto each other, holding on as hard as they can, but in the end it's just too much. The current's too strong. They've got to let go, drift apart.” 

Now it is obvious that Kathy doesn’t stand for the expectations for clones in her society, but here is a question: so does she speak out to defend her beliefs for humane emotions and love? Unfortunately, the answer is no. After Ruth’s completion, Tommy describes to Kathy two people in the water trying not to lose each other, but “in the end it’s just too much” because the “current’s too strong.” The two people, in  this context, are Kathy and Tommy. They try their best to request deferral, a system that is rumored to allow two clones who are deeply in love to defer their donations for few years. Nonetheless, it turns out deferral doesn’t exist at all: they cannot escape from their dystopian society and have to be separated by their sad fate.

After Tommy’s completion, Kathy drives to Hailsham and realizes that she will receive a notice to become a donor. She realizes she has been lost in her romantic expectation that is not available to her as a clone. Of course, she feels sad and sheds a single tear, but she also realizes she cannot avoid her predetermined destiny and decides to “let go.” The sound of the waterfall encourages the readers to think about the imagery of strong water currents both aurally and visually. The two-hour video of a continuous, strong waterfall is a good aid to imagine the difficulty for Kathy and Tommy to not “drift apart.”